Visualizations

 

Around midnight last night I got into a pout. Disconnected from the things that sometimes (usually) help. Not listening to Aum. Couldn't write a word. Not munching on a vegetable. Just sitting there disturbed.

Our living room's for just this thing.  Not the place of empty couch waiting for the theoretical visitor.  More like a combination of bedroom, craft space, so forth. Meeting place for she and me. That is the most important thing.

I invited her on the way in here and she turned up. But what to do about that? I had  no plan just empty me. And this is where she's beautiful. Sitting on the couch with peaceful expression.  No expectations.

I could have hit the tv switch.  Blue toothed it out of there. But sharing man vulnerable is a good way to go if you have to go.  As long as you know you will recover. You made it this far, remember that. Crying is not suggested.  It's not even in the picture.  But that doesn't mean all silent, tough stuff.  I'm sharing this with my buddies.  Some of them need a little help.

So I did some visualizations. Easy. Nothing to locate. No tools to find. Just bring it up, imagine it, proceed. Share the doing with her. My girl likes this. My swimming pool leaks? No problem. I fill it up again.  Dopamine disclaimer.  See a physician but avoid ninety percent of what they like to do.  Pills are the problem most of the time.  Just like alcohol.  I'm on the fence about some other things.  But visualization is really clean. Cool.  Effective and potent.

And then I felt a little breeze.  A hint of Deity. I've bathed enough in this blue pool to sense when it is coming near. One reason I can feel something. I know the signs.

So that was it. We went from there. Didn't turn anything on. My baby is an angel. She's far beyond my star. Let me share a visualization. Wife with angel wings. Stands up in the living room.  Trees turn, look this way. Moon shoots down a welcome. I move over. Watch.

Together we moved on from there. One reason we still are here. Today is brilliant. Sun shining. I think I might go find a tool and start working somewhere.